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Back from Paradise, Feeling Kinda Miserable…

Ok, so most of my friends have flown away and I’ve been left hear to fend for myself… by myself. I got back from Hawaii and realized that, really, I’m really, REALLY REALLY, not going to see Leah or Ryan for a very long while. I mean, three months doesn’t seem all that long, but when people are as close as we are, it seems like sooo long! Ryan wrote me this mass email and it was so great because it’s nice to know that there is someone else out there who loves to write lots and lots about basically nothing, but at the same time, loves talking about it. He showed me his webpage too, and he’d written this review thingy about the demo CD that I made of six songs and it was nothing but praise and goodness for the stoopid thing. I mean, I guess it’s ok, but I just feel like it could be so much better. I wish I had the same ability as Michelle Branch or Vanessa Carton who have voices that are so powerful and great and… Obviously, I’m envious, but honestly, who wouldn’t be? And really, I don’t have the look of a musician, (who are all skinny, attractive people) and I don’t have the confidence in myself to perform in front of my own friends, let alone a whole audience filled with people I’ve never met.

Of course, I would never stop writing songs or singing because I love doing it–it’s so fun! I only wish that I were as quality as the artists that are playing in my stereo or performing at the concerts I attend. Seriously! How do people get so good!? And how can I do the same!? So many questions and I have no answers! I have a guitar lesson tomorrow, which I am excited for because I have not seen my teacher and a good long time and I really wanna learn, learn, learn! Because I wanna be a great lead guitarist and I know no one else who can help me to become so.

I will write more later, but now I have to go to sleep because I am dead tired! Later! Hang loose! Aloha!